I found the first blog I started. It has entries from almost three years ago:

http://www.blurty.com/users/oldblue/

Why do I keep a blog?

I feel like I don't say anything of substance, aside from the occasional from-the-gut honesty.

I suppose it allows me some control of what I disclose to people and what I don't, and I feel like I haven't had a lot of control in the past couple of weeks.

If I had to put a label on how I feel, it would be empty, like I'm hollow where my ribcage used to be.

What I used to look forward to isn't there anymore, and that's a hard thing to accept.

Fuck it, I need a dog.